Why I call myself a writer

This is my first blog for More than Writers, so let me introduce myself: I’m Kathryn, a Christian, a wife and mother, a reader, gardener and organizer. And a writer.

I have an enquiring mind (so I like to say; my children say I’m nosey!). I also have a history degree, an out-of-date teaching qualification and have previously worked for the Church of England, the Methodist church and the Baptist church. I currently have a part-time, paid job as an invigilator and several unpaid roles: taxi-driver, PA, housekeeper and adviser to 2 sporty teenagers; church leader, occasional language tutor. And writer.

The last one is always tagged on, despite writing being the thing I have to do. The thing that brings me closest to my true self. If I can’t write for any length of time I feel out of sorts and wobbly in my inmost being. I have to write. I was created to write.

But I have little to show for it. No shelves of books with my name on (just one, co-authored, more years ago than I care to remember). No income, no reviews; lots of rejections, but who’s boasting about those? If no one is reading what I write, am I even a writer at all?

And I don’t like to talk about what I write, especially with non-writers. I’m very private and it’s very personal. I don’t mean I write memoir or autobiography, or anything that clearly reveals who I am. But creating something is a giving of oneself; writing feels like a sharing of my soul. I don’t want to answer clumsy questions about it.

The result is, I rarely admit to people that I write.  🤐

But I am trying to change that. As I get older, I feel more comfortable in myself, and more confident in the quality of what I produce. Joining groups of other writers has helped too. I’ve discovered I’m not alone in my diffidence; but that at the same time, there are people who exude confidence and proclaim themselves as writers with much less to show for it than I have. And that even those people sometimes question whether they can do it; or if it’s a legitimate use of their time. Maybe doubt is part of writing, in the same way as doubt is part of faith. And working through those doubts brings us to a place of renewed conviction, and renewed trust in our Creator.

I call myself a writer because that is what I am and what I believe I was created and gifted to be. And that is more important than vast readership or glowing reviews.

Although I would still like a small shelf of books featuring my name!