I'm Going on an Agent Hunt, I'm not Scared

I’m going on an Agent Hunt, I want to catch the right one but I’m scared. And the more I allow the fear to

swim around my head, the ‘what-ifs’ contaminate my mind and consume me like a plague. What if they

don’t like it? What if they say my writing is not to standard? What if I’m too slow? What if… 

Of course, you know I’m talking about pitching to agents! But why be scared? What is the point? And what, exactly, is there to be scared about? 

Uh, oh, thick oozy mud, and a swirling, whirling snowstorm. Yes, our writing journey will be full of pitfalls, challenges, and the opportunity to learn from our mistakes. But fear will do nothing except slow us down and, if we allow it, defeat us entirely. When immobilised by the big bad bear in that narrow, gloomy cave, we can’t go over it, we can’t go under it, we need to face it head-on.

Let’s take a look at the big bad bear of fear in more detail. Am I afraid I possess only one idea, one story, one set of characters that should they fail, I’ll be forever doomed to failure-dom? Am I afraid of being told that I can’t write for toffee or that my extravagant overuse of the ‘ing’ word is rather annoying, infuriating, exasperating and irritating?

When I really think about it, I’m not afraid of those things. That’s just the big bad bear telling me fibs. So what is it? Why hesitate? I wonder, could it be pride? To expose my masterpiece to possible criticism and rejection? To risk my fragile ego? 

This week, in the land of the little people (aka Class 5S aged 9 and a half) we discussed how making mistakes can actually help us to grow. But first, we need to take a risk, give it a go. It astonishes me that children today seem to feel immense pressure to be right all the time, and will even refuse to work because they are afraid they will get it wrong! During a spelling test, one of my children went on strike because he couldn’t spell one word. He put down his pencil and declared he was nothing more than a failure. “WHAT?” I cried. “If you got everything right all the time, I wouldn’t need to teach you!” Mistakes are great! They help us to identify what we need to learn. They help us to move forward.

And there it is, the dilemma. Because unless one takes the risk and exposes one’s fragile ego one cannot grow and soar into the heights of success-dom. Together, we can choose to march through the refining fires to be shaped, crafted and mentored. When a rejection slip arrives in one’s inbox, it’s time to celebrate, to look at it with pride and declare, “I have not failed. I am not discouraged, because every fruitless attempt discarded is often a step closer to success.” (Thomas Edison, Inventor and businessman 1847-1931)

So, I’m going on an Agent hunt. I’m going to catch the right one. I’m not scared. What a beautiful day! 

We're going on a Bear Hunt written by Micahel Rosen and Illustrated by Helen Oxenbury, first published 1989 Walker Books