Thorns
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| They hear the word but the worries of this life (and the deceitfulness of wealth) choke the word making it unfruitful. (matt 13:22 NIV) |
The passion translation says the seed that falls amongst the thorns has a divided heart – I don’t have a divided heart. My heart is for Jesus. I sin all the time but my heart is for Jesus. I always come back to him.
He has given me the gift of writing, yet every conceivable excuse not to write plagues me. I’m too weary, the chores are great, work is calling, and my children are teens and are going through all sorts of challenges including hospital visits and school attendance trouble. This is not a request for a pity party or for sympathy. Life can easily topple and overwhelm and I know this is a common complaint. So many people continually suffer life’s strife; sickness, poverty, bereavement, disappointment, pride stripped, plans dashed, redundancy, divorce, family dispute, depression, not to mention war, and natural disaster - these are earth’s birthing pains.
My fourteen-year-old is going through angst and struggle at the moment, crying out that he wishes he were dead; that cuts to the bone and strips me raw. A sneering voice ridicules my book for teens – confident Me – how can I write such guidance when my own teens are struggling? Am I a fraud?
Yet, the voice doesn’t trouble me. I’m concerned by the love and light that is desperate to crack the darkness. The nuggets of heaven’s gold that breaks through into our broken world. You see, though I can feel overwhelmed and flattened by today’s pressures, I know there is hope, growth, refining, and strength. Seek first the kingdom of God constantly flits into my mind. I am not alone, no one is.
Perhaps I’m rambling, forgive me – that’s the joy of blog writing – organised graffiti.
I suppose what I’m trying to say is to keep writing, brothers, and sisters. Write of love, of good morals, wholesome works with clean, beautiful words, split the darkness, smatter the oppression with stars, bring joy and laughter into the world, glimpses of heaven. Don’t let your troubled experiences allow you to doubt your own worth, expel the sneering voice, and rise up against the hollow laughter. Hold each other, encourage one another, and focus on the joy. We are seeds growing into healthy plants let's not be overcome by thorns.
Nikki, thank you for sharing your pain and struggles in such an honest way. This is how life is (sadly) and we should not gloss it over. It is the struggles that make us grow stronger and cling to the hope that we have in Jesus. I spent over 30 years in Youth Ministry, yet my own children all have issues. I am sure that your book to support teens will be awesome.
ReplyDeleteGood piece, needs to be said. Hoping your teens come through: ours now allover 40 are great people full of generosity and working in areas to help others - but not believers (yet) - life is a struggle isn't it, and in their generations (that is, both your children and mine), really hard in the present time.
ReplyDelete"That cuts to the bone and strips me raw." Nikki, I hear you and these are the words I would use for the issues I have with my own 14 year old. It's so painful and difficult and the enemy loves to whisper words of discouragement in our ear. Keep going! And thank you for your beautiful words.
ReplyDeleteThank you Nikki - wise and helpful words.
ReplyDeleteLovely post, Nikki! Thanks for the encouragement. Blessings.
ReplyDeleteOh my word, Nikki, my heart goes out to you and your son. I can't imagine how he is feeling. I know he has a fantastic mum who I believe loves him to the moon and back. Alongside murderous Mother, I did have a go at writing a fairy-tale version of GBBO, which I really enjoyed writing, so I'll take to heart your encouragement, and try and bring joy and focus on the laughter next time I tackle that. I'll be praying for you and your family x
ReplyDeleteThis is simply beautiful, Nikki. Thank you. ~Emily
ReplyDeleteNikki, that's beautifully written. I hesitate to say 'crafted' as it reads like a spontaneous outpouring of your griefs and joys. Definitely courageous to share your struggles without generalities covering up the reality. I particularly liked your phrase 'organised graffiti' that'll keep me motivated as a writer/blogger. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful, heartfelt blog. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing some honest, raw and encouraging thoughts. I'm looking forward to reading your book!
ReplyDeleteAll I can say is keep demonstrating your passion for Jesus and for writing. You don't need to be on the other side of it all to share what you are learning. It's a joy to watch you push forward and encourage us all as you learn tough lessons.
Blessings.