Just one Thing by Wendy H. Jones
I'm sure you'll agree it's been a pretty strange year. So far I've taken everything in my stride and maintained my equilibrium and my cheery disposition - stayed home, masked up, socially distanced, barely seen a soul and generally kept going. I've coped fairly well and just got on with things, like a lot of people around the world. However, today (as I write this blog in advance), just one thing tipped me right over the emotional edge.
I take most things in my stride and try to see the best of everything but an email I received had me in tears. Now, before you worry, no one had died or was injured in any way, it was to do with writing. You're probably wondering why I was so distraught over an issue to do with writing. To be honest, the issue is not what I'm talking about; the issue doesn't actually matter. What I do want to talk about is our emotional wellbeing. I want to talk about the fact that it is okay not to be okay. We were designed with a range of emotions and we were designed to feel deeply and we will. If God calls us to be writers then we will feel deeply about every aspect of what we do as writers. Sometimes we need to acknowledge our emotions and allow ourselves to feel them. And sometimes just one tiny thing will tip you over the emotional cliff just as it did with me today. I was obviously wound up tighter than I knew and this was just the final thing which released the emotional spring. To be honest I was ready to give up the whole writing thing at midday today.
As Christians we often say everything is grand when often we are screaming inside. As Brits, and especially us Scots, we shy away from real emotions and being honest about how we feel. Hence my honesty today. I want you to know if you are feeling more emotional at the moment, you are not alone.
Now, I don't have a cat so I can't use that as an emotional comfort blanket. Instead I did what I do best, I turned my thoughts to books and writing. It got me thinking how I could use that experience to my advantage. What if a character didn't realise quite how wound up they were and just one tiny thing sent them into a spiral of destruction. How could this help to shape your own characters feelings and make them a more rounded character? How can we challenge our disappointments, fears and challenges into our writing. That's what I will be doing. How about you? Do you do the same? It also made me think about whether I do give my characters a full range of emotions or are they functioning on one emotional plane. Widening a character's emotional palette can bring them to life.
Before anyone worries, I am feeling much more cheerful now. I am still disappointed at the news I received but my usual sunny nature has returned. I'm writing up a storm and have got over that give it all up feeling. I truly am okay and equilibrium has returned.
I want to finish by saying, look after yourself emotionally as well as physically. You are precious.
About the Author
Wendy H Jones is the Amazon Number 1 best-selling author of the award winning DI Shona McKenzie Mysteries. Her Young Adult Mystery, The Dagger’s Curse was a finalist in the Woman Alive Readers Choice Award. She is also The President of the Scottish Association of Writers, an international public speaker, and runs conferences and workshops on writing, motivation and marketing. Wendy is the founder of Crime at the Castle, Scotland’s newest Crime Festival. She is the editor of a Lent Book, published by the Association of Christian Writers and also the editor of the Christmas Anthology from the same publisher. Her first children's book, Bertie the Buffalo, was released in December 2018. Motivation Matters: Revolutionise Your Writing One Creative Step at a Time, was released in May 2019. The Power of Why: Why 23 Women Took the Leap to Start Their Own Business was released on 29th June, 2020. Marketing Matters: Sell More Books was realised on 31st July 2020. Bertie Goes to the Worldwide Games and the third book in the Fergus and Flora Mysteries will be published in 2021
Thanks for your honesty Wendy. We are going through unprecedented times and 'just one more thing' keeps coming. Stay strong – keep writing – God bless xx
ReplyDeleteThank you, Eileen
DeleteOh Wendy, I know just what you mean. I have had days like this. Fortunately, my course at the moment is mostly keeping me focused but sometimes I miss my dog and would love a cat or something to cuddle. Sending you lots of love and virtual hugs. Bless you, Sheila xx
ReplyDeleteThank you Wendy. I know exactly what you mean about the tightly wound coil being released. The trouble is, this may happen on a much wider scale nationwide and worldwide in the next few months. Many will feel that coil has been wound tighter and tighter for them during this pandemic, and depending upon how the politicians handle it, the roll-out of the vaccine may represent a sudden release bringing all sorts of consequences. Yes we can use these emotions in our writing: plus our sharpened understanding and awareness of human nature, as we have observed the multitude of ways people have responded to this crisis.
ReplyDeleteOur family suffered a body blow this weekend with the strong possibility of one dearly loved member of it being life-threateningly ill. We wanted to be together to face it as a family unit but we couldn’t physically be so. We got by with FaceTime, WhatsApp, praying together on the phone, etc. By yesterday morning as we waited for the test results , we were all shattered.
ReplyDeleteIT WAS GOOD NEWS! Not what had been warned to expect at all. And we all just broke down and grat! (Scottish for wept). As my oldest daughter said, we had all felt, when we first got the probably-bad news, like ‘Seriously? After this hell-ish year, we get this as well?’ It was as if the well of our emotions was beginning to run dry and we needed to go deeper and deeper to find any kind of emotional response.
There are times when we become almost punch drunk with emotional onslaughts and we may seem calm and coping, whereas what we are is dazed and sinking. As you say, Wendy, we can take insights from these times in our lives and use them to enhance our writing and especially the back stories of our characters.
I'm glad the news was good. That must have been such fabulous moment
DeleteOur family suffered a body blow this weekend with the strong possibility of one dearly loved member of it being life-threateningly ill. We wanted to be together to face it as a family unit but we couldn’t physically be so. We got by with FaceTime, WhatsApp, praying together on the phone, etc. By yesterday morning as we waited for the test results , we were all shattered.
ReplyDeleteIT WAS GOOD NEWS! Not what had been warned to expect at all. And we all just broke down and grat! (Scottish for wept). As my oldest daughter said, we had all felt, when we first got the probably-bad news, like ‘Seriously? After this hell-ish year, we get this as well?’ It was as if the well of our emotions was beginning to run dry and we needed to go deeper and deeper to find any kind of emotional response.
There are times when we become almost punch drunk with emotional onslaughts and we may seem calm and coping, whereas what we are is dazed and sinking. As you say, Wendy, we can take insights from these times in our lives and use them to enhance our writing and especially the back stories of our characters.
You're so right. It's often those 'straw that breaks the camel's back' moments that diagnose where we were really at. And you think, 'Why am I upset about this?' because the incident itself doesn't seem to warrant the reaction! The truth is, it's all the stuff behind it that does.
ReplyDeleteSo very true. Great insight!
DeleteSo very true. Great insight!
DeleteYou are right. Things can seem okay but underneath are at breaking point and we are not aware
DeleteMore timely than you can know, Wendy. Thanks for letting your slip show and God bless you.
ReplyDeleteThank you, I hope it helped you
Delete'As Christians...' That's so significant - and so how, if we are as a group going about putting on the appearance of being okay when we are not okay, that needs careful thought and assessment. We must try not to publically admire the honesty of others only when they break down, while we ourselves are continuing to show no untidy emotions. I'm not saying we should do the opposite - but we need to check in on this... (I am also not saying I am 'not guilty', as for example I found being asked 'how are you getting on, I hope you are feeling better' very difficult to take, after being seriously ill in 2018... I did not want to discuss the illness, the recovery, or how I 'felt'! But that to appear unfazable isn't more Christian than to show/share stuff, even though the Protestant ingrained way sometimes seems to be a competition to be stronger in faith than others -
ReplyDeleteAll good points, Clare. I think we all just muddle along doing the best we can and hoping we help someone in the process.
DeleteBless you.
ReplyDelete