It began with shortbread and tea

 

Photo by Heather Barnes on Unsplash

 

A pot of Lady Grey freshly brewed. Thyme and hazelnut shortbread on plates. Bach playing on the gramophone. 11 suspects sat around the room. DI. Jones relished moments like these. It's what he lived for. Finally unveiling the killer.

This was a recent very short story (VSS) that I wrote on Twitter, when the prompt was gramophone. The pot of tea was the image that came first. The bergamot scent that particular brew brings. Then the tasty shortbread, something for the reader to savour. And then finally the prompt. And if you are going to have a gramophone, then you need some music playing on it. Somehow classical struck me as the right choice. 

A fellow writer once said that I 'do cosy crime so well' which is why the detective inspector chose to make an appearance. As for the murder that's been committed, only DI. Jones knows the answer to that one. 

So why am I sharing all this with you? All because of my next Alpha challenge. Which is this:

Write a story or poem in a maximum of 300 words in which you include the use of all five senses. (Touch, sight, smell, hearing, taste).

Rather than start afresh, I thought I'd stretch myself, by turning my VSS into a longer piece, going into more detail on each of the different senses mentioned. Which of course is easier said than done. 

Too begin with, I've reduced the suspects. There are now only seven. I've also changed the piece of music playing. It's now Debussy's Clare De Lune. It's one of my favourite pieces of classical music, plus I believe it will draw the reader in more, giving them a specific piece. 

The challenge I have is tracing the thread of this story. The deeper I get into it, the more I have to answer Why, What, When, Who, How etc. I got 150 words into DI. Jones having a flashback as he bites into his shortbread. He's six years old, sat on his grandma's knee, Debussy on the gramophone, and all is well. I then thought of shattering this beautiful scene by Grandma been shot by sheep raiders, and that's what leads Jones to dedicate his life to fighting against crime. 

Writing it down like this sounds simple, but it's not. First of all, it's not easy to break up a cosy scene, without making it cliche or clumsy, and second, I need to make it sound believable, and do all this within 300 words. Not easy. 

Still, I have until Nov 22nd, so I still have time. And I'll let you know how I got on in a future blog post.

Let me know how you'd tackle this challenge, and which would be your favourite sense to write about in the comments or on Facebook.

 

Martin is a writer, baker, photographer and storyteller. He's been published in the ACW Christmas anthology and Lent devotional. He's currently honing his craft at flash fiction, and you can find him on Twitter here.