AND THE WINNER IS... NOT... Joy Margetts

 

Or 'how to handle being nominated for an Award and then not winning it!'

A couple of weeks ago I received a most surprising email. Out of nowhere I discovered that Instant Apostle had put one of my novels forward for the CRT (Christian Resources Together UK) Fiction Book of the Year Award. They were contacting me to let me know that ‘The Bride’ had been shortlisted as one of three finalists. What an absolute honour! For any author to know that their work is considered potentially award winning, is such a huge encouragement. I was ever so slightly overwhelmed!

The news of my award nomination came at a really good time. Life has been challenging lately, with a number of discouragements and difficulties affecting us as a family. I was really grateful – to my publishers, to those who had judged my book worthy, but to God as well. He knew how much I needed to hear some good news. Some really good news. Something definitely worth celebrating.

So then the waiting began. I knew the winner would be announced at the CRT event on the evening of the 17^th September. I was proud to be a finalist, and made sure people knew about it. Mostly the response was excitement for me, lots of lovely words of encouragement, quite a few of the ’Oh, you are sure to win’ type comments. It was hard to not get swept along with these. I kept checking myself to make sure I was going to be OK with not winning. After all I was one of three great authors up for the prize, including my good friend and Instant Apostle stable-mate, Jo Sheringham, and Tessa Afshar, who is one of my favourite US Biblical Fiction authors.

But I am human.

I did begin to imagine what it would be like to be able to call myself an ‘Award Winning Author’. I began to wonder what it might mean for book sales, and my visibility out there in the murky world of UK Christian Fiction. I even wrote a personal blog about labels, and whether ‘Award Winning’ was an important one. I concluded in that blog that, whilst it would be nice to have, it was not as important as other more worthy titles I would like to be known by in this season of my life.

That was before I didn’t win!

Thanks to some very good friends sitting in the audience at the CRT Awards Ceremony, with their phones on live video, I got to hear first hand when my name was not the one produced from the golden envelope. I was genuinely really pleased that the winner was Jo Sheringham, for her book The Perfect Companion, a book I had loved and been honoured to endorse. I was glad for UK Christian Fiction that the award did not go to an already famous US based author. I was thrilled for Instant Apostle, as they had their commitment to publishing good Christian Fiction recognised. But I was also disappointed.

I am only human!

That night I didn’t sleep well. Unhelpful, negative, and self-condemning irrational thoughts vied for victory over the more balanced, positive ones! ‘My writing is rubbish’, ‘I don’t know why I bother’, ‘I most likely came third’, ‘Someone important didn’t like it’, you know how it goes. Instead of, ‘You came in the top three!’, ‘Anyone else would be thrilled to be even nominated,’ ‘Of course people liked your book, or it wouldn’t have made the short-list’!

It was just my disappointment speaking. And that is OK. As long as I didn’t stay there. After all being a nominee is fantastic! An honour and an achievement. I know there are many reading this right now that would love to be in my position (believe me it really did come as a surprise!).The more time that passes the more at peace I am with losing, and the more thankful I am that I was even nominated!

Someone told me that the CRT Awards are to UK Christian publishing what the Oscars are to film making. I’m not sure about that. But if it is a good analogy then I am in very good company. Glenn Close, Tom Cruise, and Richard Burton, are among a list of Hollywood icons who have never won an Oscar, but were multiple nominees. I googled it! The most shocking to me was Liam Neeson – nominated for his role in ‘Schindler’s List’, which he DID NOT WIN! Now that really is a travesty in my opinion.

Two things really helped me to move past the disappointment. Firstly, some precious time with God and His Word, when He reminded me, in His still sweet voice, how proud He is of me and what He has helped me to write. How I am writing because He wants me to, and that award or no award, my books are, and will be a blessing to others. 

Secondly – a video call with my eighteen month old granddaughter, where she of few words called me ‘Nana’ repeatedly, smiled and waved at me, and then proceeded to draw all over her face with a washable felt tip pen. This is life, and this is joy. No book awards necessary.

Joy Margetts is a published author and blogger. Her books are works of Christian Historical fiction. Set in medieval Wales against the backdrop of Cistercian abbey life, they tell stories of faith, hope and God's redemptive power. Her debut novel 'The Healing' was published by Instant Apostle on 19 March 2021.

'The Pilgrim', her second full length novel, was published by Instant Apostle on 22 July 2022, and her third novel, 'The Bride', published on 20th October 2023. Her first non-fiction book, an Advent Devotional, 'Christ Illuminated' was published in September 2023.

'The Stranger', her fourth full length novel is coming soon! Due for publication November 2024