A Beautiful Thing by Tracy Williamson
I would love it to be said of me that I'd lived a beautiful life.
That I'd allowed His love to melt my heart, to live and love for Him.
That He be my goal, my life, my love, and my significance.
What is my significance?
What is yours?
Sometimes I long to 'make it' as a writer, to say that my work has been accepted, that I have a contract to sign...But although such things do bring joy, it doesn't last.
It fizzes and bubbles and is gone.
Maybe you too struggle with a sense of insignificance and feel that the things you do or say are like drops in the ocean? What difference will it make in the big scheme of things if I write that blog or shelve it? Share what's on my heart or let it die? Reach out to someone I know is struggling or let someone else better qualified than me get on with it?
I find that inner voice of insignificance paralysing at times and looking back I can see so many instances of when I've held back from doing something that was on my heart because deep down I am believing a lie that I am insignificant and my efforts won't be of any lasting worth.
I was touched deep in that inner place of self rejection today as I read the story of the woman who broke her alabaster jar of perfume and poured it over Jesus head (Mark 14:3 - 9).
Like me she had made mistakes.
Like me she was surrounded by negative voices.
Like me she wanted to give Jesus something precious to express her love and deep gratitude.
How did she take that step?
I sensed the Lord whispering to me: 'she acted from her heart. She knew that she would be judged and her motives scrutinised. But she followed her heart. She had been moved as she heard the stories of what I was doing. Her motivation was to say thank you. I loved that and I described what she'd done as a beautiful thing and said it would never be forgotten.'
And of course it never has been forgotten as we are thinking about it now, in this blog!
Her action took on great and lasting significance because it was from the heart.
Acting from her heart she gave the most precious thing she had,
She wasn't wondering if this would be classed as an achievement or would make her look more spiritual.
She just wanted to love Jesus while she had the chance.
And He received her love and was deeply blessed.
The story doesn't record her reaction to Jesus, but I know my own. I feel overcome and full of an almost painful joy at the thought that my efforts to love and to offer Him my broken gifts will touch His heart and cause Him to declare that I've done a beautiful thing!
So what can I give Him?
And I want to write from my heart as an expression of my love and thanks
not as a means of getting on.
I want to give my all and to follow every opportunity to act, to give, to write, to love
to know that even when I don't understand why,
that my gifts when offered this way,
Will be beautiful