How do you deal with unwanted gifts? by Elaine Langford

 

I have to admit that I’m not great at receiving gifts. Mainly because I’m rubbish at feigning delight at the gifts that are just not me. While that sounds like I’m ungrateful, the truth is I don’t like waste. I prefer plain and practical gifts. Due to skin sensitivities, I especially don’t like perfume or ‘fancy’ bath products that people think ‘all women’ love. Even worse is getting something to wear. Often the size or colour is wrong which makes you feel too fat, too old or just not ‘on trend’! There’s also some disappointment to realising that people, especially family, don’t know me well enough to know what I’d like.

I have one friend who always seems to get it right. We don’t spend a lot of time together and her gifts may appear random, but I always find them useful. When she was going through a difficult time recently, I wanted to encourage her and assure her that she was valued. So I wrote to tell her I was always grateful for her thoughtfulness whenever I used a bag she gave me. Then I realised I could list out a few things I used regularly that were gifts from her.

I really appreciate the gift of writing, though sometimes I wish I had it in a bigger size and maybe a different colour.  I was brought up in a rural school with a single teacher who spent all day completing the Puzzler magazine. Our English lessons were mostly self-led from a book with some group spelling sessions thrown in. While this developed my interest in words and crossword puzzles, my grammar was poor which meant I struggled at Secondary school. As I was better at logic, Maths and Physics took my interest and I went on to study Maths and a have a long career in IT.

Recently I realised I kept wishing I had followed a career in journalism. Especially after getting some gifts of opportunities when living in Orkney twenty years ago. However, when I returned South, I move back into working in IT full-time. Mainly as I wasn't sure I could convince people I had the experience needed for it. Though as a Christian, God has travelled with me in my career and writing journey, so I shouldn’t be too disappointed about where I am now.

When planning for this blog on gifts, I initially wanted to extol one of my favourite Bible verses, In 2 Timothy 1:6, Paul encourages Timothy to fan into flame a gift he was given. This always feels relevant as a writer. Firstly, to identify the gifts you have, then to work on those embers to make them bigger and better. However, I started to wonder, ‘was this a gift that Timothy wanted? Especially as it was imparted when people laid hands on him. Then I was reminded of Ecclesiastes 5:19, where the narrator suggests, ‘[people should] accept their lot and be happy in their toil—this is a gift of God.’

Oops, that’s me told! It doesn’t matter if we want it on not, if the gift is from God we should make the most of it. Just like the gifts from my friend, God’s gifts are always useful. Unlike my family, he also knows what size and colour suits us. So, it looks like I need to be more grateful for my career as it has panned out, while considering what writing gifts God has given that I need to spend more time ‘fanning’. Maybe you’d like to join me and let me know what God is saying to you.

Elaine Langford is an erratic writer living in South East London. She's looking for an electic fan, if anyone wants to gift one. Her dormant blogs can be seen at Faith Bites (when life bites, faith bites back) and Poetry Puddles.