ACW

ACW

Sunday, 27 May 2018

The Right Shoes by Tracy Williamson

Yesterday I took delivery of a new pair of shoes that I'd ordered online.   Summer shoes for those wetter days when sandals don't quite work. Shoes that I can enjoy wearing both indoors and out.  Great reasons, yet I felt miserable, for the shoes looked overly sensible and fuddy duddy.  They made me feel a couple of decades older than my years and as someone who loves pretty, feminine things, I coveted dainty shoes with heels!

And yet when I tried them on, the shoes fitted me perfectly and were so comfortable that I could walk without fear of losing my balance. I have very poor balance because of being ill with Encephalitis as a child, so it was a joy to feel secure in these new shoes and to walk with ease.  And yet....I was still hankering after heels!  I wanted to look trendy! I wanted to be cool and look like a woman with clout.  Why did I have to go the sensible route when my heart was set on being powerfully pretty?
As I complained thus, the realisation came that in a similar way, I often hanker to have a different writing or ministry style.  I love exciting,  humorous writing and speakers that make me laugh or cry or whose talks are dynamically life changing.  I deeply admire people with practical gifts and long to be someone who can put up a shelf or know what to do in a crisis...I try so hard to take these gifts I admire in others and inject them into my own way of being, only to find that somehow I'm staggering around,  unable to walk straight, if at all. 
And then the Lord spoke in my heart - 'If I'd wanted you to be a Jane or Helen why did I make you Tracy? What's so wrong with the gifts I gave you?  Don't they fit who you are?  Who else can write, speak or be Tracy but you? Stop coveting others gifts and start cherishing what fits you.'
And with that  I saw how silly I've been.  My new shoes may not be trendy but they fit me and suit my uneven way of walking. In these shoes I can step out with confidence and know that I'll easily get from A to B; As I'm not worried about falling I can enjoy the walk which then becomes fun and joy giving. 
And thus through this lesson from my shoes, I will accept that I am Tracy rather than hankering to be someone else and will nurture my gift rather than coveting theirs. And I'm sure I'll find then that I can walk, (write, speak or be) with real confidence and effectiveness.  And it'll be fun cos I'll be sharing my true heart not someone else's and that brings the greatest joy, to me and also to those I share 'Tracy' with. Amazingly I may find at times I can even be humorous or dynamic...Not through me being Helen or Jane, but just through walking in my own shoes.
So now methinks, its time to get those shoes on, velcro the straps and walk..




Tracy Williamson is deaf and partially sighted following Encephalitis at 2 which also damaged her coordination.  Tracy is an author and speaker working with the blind Gospel singer Marilyn Baker for MBM Trust, a music and teaching ministry.  www.mbm-ministries.org  Tracy shares a home in Kent with Marilyn and their two assistance dogs. 

12 comments:

  1. Tracy, I love this. Brilliant piece of writing. I am very glad you wrote this as Tracy and not as Helen or Jane.

    During a time of prayer ministry someone once said to me God wants me to be me. He said if you’re not you God’s got no Plan B. You are the only one who can be you. He made you you because he wants you to be you. Although I have never forgotten that I don’t always act on it. Your post is a timely reminder to walk in my own shoes.

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    1. Thanks Lynda, yours is a timely reminder to me too! It's an ongoing lesson isn't it! so glad y6ou found my blog encouraging. xx

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  2. This is great Tracy! Thanks for sharing. For what it's worth I think one of your gifts may be honest, genuine writing which others connect with. I struggle too with often wanting to be like someone else in my writing style (in fact I blogged about it recently) and am learning to rely on God for the next step, rather than simply follow what this person did or that person said. I think my attitude can sometimes be similar to that of a child on his birthday, receiving a gift his parents have been planning for weeks and are SO excited about...only to then be really disappointed that he wasn't given what his best friend has. When I think how sad that would make me as a parent, it reminds me of the hurt we must cause our Father God when we don't accept the gifts he has given us. Great post! Keep walking and writing as Tracy please! :)

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    1. That is a very searching thought Lucy. Thanks for sharing and for encouraging me too.

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  3. Oh how I identify with this! I too would like to wear those sparkly narrow shoes with high heels and need to learn the same lesson that God made me me, not to look like or be the same as anyone else however much I might admire them... Thank you Tracy for writing this powerful piece with such a profound and relevant message.

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    1. Thank you for being so encouraging. I'm really glad it spoke to you.

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  4. I think a lot of these fashionable shoes are only really suitable for sitting in not walking anyway although I wouldn't have said that arguing about it as a young teenager at home! Anyway we need sensible shoes for walking dogs for example and that has to be one of life's pleasures.

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    1. Ha that made me smile Lindis! Just imagine us going round the field with the dogs in those stilettos! lol!

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  5. Lovely post, Tracy! I, too, am prone to wear sensible shoes because of long-standing back pain. I long for the day I can prance in sparkly high heels. Maybe in heaven, we can do a twirl together? Meantime, keep on writing your unique lovely stuff ��

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  6. If the new shoes are the ones in the picture, Tracy, I love them! They look both smart and comfortable, and they are Rieker which is one of my favourite shoe brands - being German they fit my broad Teutonic feet (my parents were Austrian) unlike British shoes made for narrow English feet. Thank you for reminding me to walk in my own shoes and not someone else's. For what it's worth, those sparkly ones with heels look like a torture invented especially for women with more money than sense.

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    1. Lol, yes they are my new shoes and I am glad you like them. My feet are actually quite narrow but I have high insteps so need a bar over the foot to secure them and quite wide heels or my ankle turns over! yes Reiker ones are great. Glad the post encouraged you xx

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