Rejection by Eileen Padmore

In a recent ACW zoom, Fran suggested we consider 'rejection' as a topic. I reflected on an article refused by Woman Alive 11 years ago. They had published my two previous submissions, and the next, so why not this? I came up with:

*  Over confidence
*  Lack of editing
*  Padding
*  'Spiky' observer stance with attitude

Regarding the latter, it was probably a blind spot then. In the article, I observed a four-generation family reunion. The reader might have puzzled over my detachment, which maybe was because my many siblings, nieces and nephews have progeny and I don't. I love children (well behaved ones) but have escaped being blessed with them myself. Whoops, that's the spiky bit! Of course, I've missed out desperately – or have I?

So here is the article, reduced from some 1000 words to the 300 requested by Fran.  I've removed some of the barbs (hopefully) but it's a tad disjointed. Can I blame word poverty for that?

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Four generation family reunion

Resistance had been futile against the powerful matriarchal push for a family reunion. What a mix!

Great-grandfather was on a mission to find a comfy chair indoors whilst the three great-grannies, dressed in assorted flowery curtain-like material, lined themselves up in the conservatory next to the food.

The hubbub of greetings subsided as the more active organised themselves into age ghettos outdoors.  I was pondering the generation gap when the great-grandmas provided unexpected insight.

'There she goes, I knew she would', said one, as young mum bore screaming baby out to garden. 'She's gone to ask dad to change the nappy'. Bets were taken but the negatives lost. Back came dad with distressed child.

'Told you so', crowed grandma. It's what they do now. The men do it all. We were born at the wrong time!'

Later, great-grandfather was discovered indoors by those bored with the topics of retirement and childbirth. Not that he was saying anything. He was just there. He had always been there. Veteran of both world wars, business downturns, teenage tantrums – there was no need to explain about the christian faith that has seen him through. It was part of him, woven through every aspect of his person.

Later, things began to wind down with the call for photos accompanied by a heated battle between toddlers over choice of DVD. Skilful arbitration won. Two generations earlier they'd have been spanked and put to bed.

Had it been some kind of primitive tribal ritual, I wondered?

We'd seen the traditional maternal role in action: to nurture, communicate, accept difference, reduce hierarchy and help the vulnerable; then great-grandfather's christian influence permeating down through the generations.

You can't choose your family, which may be why such bonding processes are vital. Apparently we're likely to get huge surprises about who else is in heaven. Could extended family gatherings down here be useful experience for what comes next?

Eileen Padmore has retired from a life spent in health care  and academia, having worked in Sierra Leone, Zambia, Eire and Northern Ireland (in the troubles) as well as inner city Birmingham and Leeds.  She has had articles published in Woman Alive, Christian Writer and contributed to the popular ACW Lent Book. Married to a professional musician, the family includes a feisty springer spaniel and a large African tortoise. Her website/blog launched recently: benedictunravelled.uk