The desire to be better

For the first time in four years, I didn't make the cut for the National Flash Fiction Day Flashflood. I had three opportunities to submit, and failed each time. I was disappointed and frustrated, but for the first time since I started writing, it didn't make me want to quit. It made me want to be better.

I'm not good enough. Don't hear those words with my whinging voice, I'm saying them with my determined voice. There is always the personal preference of whoever makes decisions on submissions, but after three tries, each a slightly different style, I cannot ignore the likelihood my writing is just not good enough. I don't feel I've developed much in the last year or two. I need to improve.

I'm super proud of these babies
but the next one needs to be better!

I mentioned my dislike for editing in my February post, I'd love to tell you that it's getting easier, it's not. But the manuscript is getting better. I look at the notes on the first draft and I see the holes. I don't feel confident I can make it better. I just keep trying to improve it, section by section, sentence by sentence. 

At the moment, I'm investigating doing some post grad study in Creative Writing. I live an extremely busy life, so this would not only be a major financial commitment, but also a major time commitment. It's not a decision I can make lightly, but I want to learn. I can read more, write more and get feedback, those all work to improve our writing. A structured learning environment where I'm challenged and tested sounds scary, yet I'm excited at the thought of it.

I'm heading off to a college open day in June, and I'll start investigating some student funding. I appreciate the prayer of this group's prayer page. I'd appreciate continued prayer for wisdom and provision - of funds and time! This is only the right step if it's God's will. As in all my writing ventures - this verse applies... Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labour in vain. (Psalm 127:1 ESV)

I'm excited to see what the next building block will look like :)

Have any of you taken courses? Got qualifications? Do you teach writing courses?
I would love to hear your thoughts on studying the craft...

Annmarie Miles is from Dublin, Ireland. 
She lives with her husband Richard who is a pastor in the Eastern Valley of Gwent, in South Wales. She writes short stories, magazine articles, devotional pieces for Christian radio, and blogs about her faith at www.auntyamo.com Her first collection of short stories published in 2013, is called 'The Long & The Short of it'. Her second collection, 'A Sense of the Sea and other stories,' was published in 2018. She is currently editing a non-fiction book about being an overweight Christian called, 'Have mercy on me O Lord, a slimmer.'