Why I'm not a poet by Jane Clamp


I thought I’d be a writer,

It seemed the perfect fit.

I have ideas, a laptop

And a smashing place to sit.



I thought I’d be a writer,

I have just what it takes:

A love of words and, most of all,

A love of coffee breaks.



My friends say I am mouthy,

Or they do when they’re polite.

What better way to spend my day

Than “speaking” as I write?



I’m going to be a writer,

I’ve adjusted all my clothes,

Adding in the pockets

Where a book for sale goes.



I’m going to be a writer,

I’m doing a writery dance: 

I dream of the day when bills to pay

Come out of my advance.



In thinking I’m a writer

I wrote an awful lot

But when I read it back again,

I found I’d lost the plot.



I’m going to be a writer

But the world will have to wait

I’ve only just got in from work

And it’s ages since I ate.









Jane Clamp is Groups' Coordinator for ACW and writes for radio. She is finishing her second novel whilst spending most of her time up a ladder decorating.

Comments

  1. Replies
    1. You'll be glad I swapped the turgid introspection I'd uploaded earlier in the week!

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    2. Yes, I am! Poem, funny poem, is fun!

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  2. Super poem, Jane. I think you have got what it takes!

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  3. Lovely Jane - and now the music ?

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  4. God's most precious gift to us: a sense of humour!

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    Replies
    1. Absolutely! I composed it while at work, speaking into the voice memo on my phone. It made the weekend come sooner 😎

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  5. I think you chose the wrong title :)

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  6. Haha! In my head I was reading this with a Pam Ayres accent. Brilliant! X

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  7. Great poem - love the bit about getting an advance!

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